For those who follow college basketball, March is a magical time of year. For those who don’t pay close attention to the college basketball scene, March is still a pretty fun time, from filling out brackets at work to hearing horror stories from family members about their busted brackets. Now, while college students playing basketball make for a very entertaining sport, we think that some pests can give these players a run for their money. So this week, we’ve selected a few pests to play on all-star basketball team that is sure to keep your bracket alive.
The best point guard in the game, in our opinion, is an ant. These types of players are not only fast, but they understand the value of teamwork. As a point guard, who is most often known as the leader of the team, a good sense of teamwork is vital for success.
Over at shooting guard, we know that a mosquito would be a perfect fit. Not only are they extremely agile, but they can shoot the ball with needle-like precision. In addition, they can literally suck energy right out of their opponents, making them quite the adversary on the court.
Playing small forward, we’re drafting a flea. While fleas are small, they have the highest jump on the court, and can easily dunk on all of their other opponents—perfect for a small forward.
For a power forward, we’re looking at a spider to fill the role. Spiders are fast, nimble, and can weave a web of defense right under the basket. If you are looking for someone to play a zone defense, look no further than a spider.
Finally, for our center, we’re going to go with a cockroach. Roaches may seem small, but they are incredibly strong for their size, and will not be crushed by anything else on the court. Also, since they are an absolute pain to get rid of, the opposing team will be bound to have a very tough time of offense.
There you have it, our top-picks for a all-star pest team. This team may be able to keep your bracket alive, but they are sure to put a strain on you and your family if they decide to make your home their locker room. In the madness of March, be sure to keep an eye out for these pests—for the sake of you, your family, and your bracket.